Becoming a stand-up comic is a weird fucking life-choice. In my case, it was mostly accidental that I ended up being paid to stand on a stage say the same stupid shit to drunk bar patrons and club-goers that I’d say if I was sitting on a barstool. A friend of mine had decided he wanted to try his hand … Continue reading Comedy, Cowboys, and Liver Damage
I met a wild woman years ago, an amazing, eccentric goddess named Joan who fancied herself a "job collector". "I've had 47 jobs in my life," she declared one night over dinner, "it would KILL me to remember them all. I'd rather not. Let's not, how dull. Though there have been a few worth remembering, oh boy..." It was one … Continue reading What Do You Do For Money, Honey? PART 1:
I just met this woman. She's about my age, she's about my build. She's loud at times, brash, and clearly intelligent but not overtly trying to convince you of the fact. She doesn't need to. She's a writer. Her voice is unique to her and, at the same time, one I can relate to quite easily because it sounds a … Continue reading I Just Met Me Again, and I’m The Worst
Like a lot of women of childbearing age, my body is my mortal fucking enemy, and, quite frankly a total dick. When I was much younger, I always felt fortunate. Because, compared to some of my friends, my reproductive organs were pretty tame with little to no personality. But I had friends who, during their menstrual … Continue reading Aftercare Instructions: The Day My Uterus Exploded
Sad is the man. ...the man who realizes that he failed to work white male privilege into anything more genital-stimulating than a successful online gaming career. ...that he may have missed the whole point of having a wiener. What is the point of wiener anymore? What is life? He shakes his fist. He cries out … Continue reading Sad Is The Man
In the wake of recent accusations of sexual assault and otherwise shit behavior from serial abuser and movie mogul, Harvey Weinstein, many more women have come forward after years of living in fear of retaliation if they came forward and lodged accusations of any kind towards this powerful man. Many of them had put what they endured away, as … Continue reading Thanks, guys. I guess.
The other day, while shopping, I noticed the sections of clothing for women and clothing for men and gave it a passing thought, wondering when we were going to end up just calling them "clothes". I've wondered this off and on since hearing comedian Eddie Izzard, when someone asked him about wearing women's clothing, respond with, "They're not … Continue reading Girl Food